The Biggest Strawberry in the Entire World
I'm scared of this thing. It's a monster. Normally I don't worry about genetically modified food, but this is just wrong. Strawberries are supposed to be small. This one is morbidly obese. See how the meaty berry part has grown AROUND the stem? That's not right. The ones we grow here in the garden are small, but they taste so much better. It's a travesty, that's what it is.
This rant on something nobody else cares about has been brought to you by the Citizens Against Freakin Huge Fruit awareness council.
posted by Textual Harassment at 5:38 PM
5 Comments:
i've always hated fruit in general.
it's just not...trustworthy.
Yeah, well you're weird, Suzin. Fruit is more honest than, say, meat. It doesn't try to pretend it wasn't previously part of a living thing.
you dont consider plants living things? last i checked they WERE.
how come i didnt get this month's CAFHF newsletter? what the frickcrap?!
"you dont consider plants living things? last i checked they WERE."
"(Fruit) doesn't try to pretend it wasn't previously part of a living thing."
You can eat a hotdog and never think about what it's made of. You can go to the store and buy "beef", all cleaned and sealed in a styrofoam package, and there's little indication that it used to be a cow's butt.
Fruits like strawberries still have leaves attached, and it's easy to visualize how it grew on the plant and where it came from.
That's all I'm saying. I don't care, I think it's all delicious.
And we're still looking for voulenteers for that newsletter. Would you like to submit an essay?
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